its been awhile since i've updated this blog due to personal issues, namely work. sleeping as early as 10.30pm or maybe earlier. just occurred to me why divorce rates and pregnancy rates seem to only be ever-increasing, nothing more, nothing less. there really isnt much that can be done for people who abandon their supposed loved ones for stupid reasons, frivolous as it might seem. for all the security in the world they might offer, the only one that can offer a life-time warranty tag with it, would be yourself. yes, the truth for all housewives and part-time mothers, i must say, i truly sympathize with your non- monetary returns at the end of the day, facing a lifetime of unhappiness, normally outweighing the positive ones (not counting the times when u convinced yourself that you are indeed happy to be a punching bag for your disgruntedly drunked husband), yes life doesnt get better.

the saying that marriage is sacred seem to be refuted all over again, that instead, the certificate is only the equal of a blank paper, with no other meaning then to bind two willing crazed people, disillusioned with the false notion of pretensed love, making nothing but hot air and the creation of unwanted burdens. children.

i still remain a fervert believer of marriage although, there are times when i doubt that faithfulness and virgilant loyalty would get you anywhere. in fact, it is possible that the only way to be happy could be if there was no such thing as marriage. just cohabitation. if your not happy, just break. its as simple as it sounds, although it would not feel that way for the broken-hearted.

even if you remain in the situation where you prefer to remain bounded to your obligations, " for better or worse", sleeping in the same bed, being in the same space would only have a suffocating effect. the feeling of being neglected when you've tried your best to understand, to be there. that's the breaking point. the point where even you urself would question wat love symbolizes. crazy head over heel love, followed by a crash and burn period; or faithful devotion regardless of any heady feeling. i dont really noe which could be worse off. the former or the latter.

this idea of the institute of marriage was probably deemed as appropriate for people who wanted to have children, or wanted to be considered devoted and joint as one. ironically, often, its the lack of the ability to breath the air of the free, and the shortage of one's so- called returns in love, that would eventually lead to the divorce or the single parent family.

in anycase, if its the children your after, there's always IVF, or of cause, you can partner the same kind and have someone's else child as your own. it all works out. we dont need men, for in my case, they only make us feel inferior. yes, also dads, brothers, and all those who tell you that your not good enough. even those who always seem encouraging, there always seem to be a cap, a limit rather where after tt boundary and obligations that you feel a need to follow is overstepped, comes the break down. mental. physical. crazed-emotional madness that consumes.

meh. thank god i'm not there yet.